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Hey Soul Sister!

We all have important friendships that we don’t have access to on a regular basis. These women would most likely be members of our Tribe if not separated by time and space. Often these friendships once enjoyed both proximity and regularity. You share history and fond memories. However, something happened that physically separated the two of you. This may have involved a promotion or job change that required a move. Or perhaps one of your lifestyles or interests changed. Some examples might include:

  1. We started a family, and our friend didn’t or doesn’t plan to.

  2. We previously worked together every day, but now we don’t.

  3. We were roommates in college but haven’t regularly connected since graduation.

  4. We were childhood friends and only see each other around the holidays when we both go home to visit.

This layer of friendship I call our soul sisters because of the strong emotional connection we share. The cool thing about our sisters in this group is that when you do connect, it’s as if you haven’t skipped a beat. You are right back where you were when you last met. You often spend time reminiscing over fond memories. The time and space that has separated you has not damaged your connection. Although these relationships are now slow to evolve, they do not lose ground. Long distance best friends are so important to our wellbeing and wholeness, and here are 8 reasons why.

  1. They can offer advice as a neutral third party.

    1. This is where the physical distance is actually a benefit! She isn’t there to see and know the details of what is happening in your life so when you explain a situation she can focus in on your perspective and your feelings.

    2. She may not personally know the players in your dilemma, so her advice won’t be jaded in any direction. Her council will come from an unbiased position.

    3. Even if you are totally in the wrong, she won’t judge you and will love you anyway.

  2. They give it to you straight.

    1. First, see above.

    2. She is going to listen first. Talk you down later.

    3. Then, she’s going to agree with everything you said. She’ll tell you that everything you’re feeling is totally valid. (Bring on the warm fuzzy feels.)

    4. Then, she is going to slap you out of it and help you find solutions. (Bring on the wakeup call.)

  3. It’s always like no time has passed.

    1. No matter how much time goes by, the second you hear her voice or see her in person, it’s like you’ve been together every day for the past 10 years.

    2. Everything falls right into place like it used to be.

    3. There’s a soul nurturing comfort level there that you don’t have with other friends, which makes the time incredibly enjoyable and relaxing.

  4. When you do meet up, it’s like a soul filling mini vacation

    1. You always remember your meetups.

    2. You don’t need to be entertained or do anything fancy. You just love “being” together.

    3. Your meetups are a time that feels fun, easy-going and you can totally read each other’s minds. What’s not to love?!

  5. You have a friend for life.

    1. This is the friend you’ll have by your side through the thick and thin, and the distance will never matter because they are just a phone call away.

    2. Nothing will keep them from you in your hour of need. A plane trip across the country is nothing for this friendship.

    3. You basically won the friend lottery if you have connected with someone so deeply that time and space doesn’t hinder the connection.

  6. They make a great excuse for a trip.

    1. Did anyone say girls weekend? Well…if you insist!

    2. Road trip? I’m in!

    3. Long distance best friends reunited.

    4. You’re moving to a remote Island with wifi? Fantastic! Now I get to take a trip there. Just force me to become a world traveler why don’t you. Okay…you win! I’m there!

  7. You cherish what it means to have an amazing friend.

    1. You feel unconditionally loved and supported.

    2. You call her on her birthday. Regularly text her. Zoom on occasion…. And let’s not forget the snail mail and surprise packages.

    3. She does not need constant reassurance of your friendship. She doesn’t need to talk once a week, once a month, or once every six months.

  8. You feel special when you’re with her.

    1. In normal everyday life you don’t feel unusually important, but she treats you like you’re a big deal, and who wouldn’t want to stay friends with someone like that.

    2. When you’re with her, you feel validated, valued and worthy.

    3. This is a beautiful safe space, whereby the time you have invested in each other led you to know the ins and outs of each other’s lives.

This village is an elite group of women. Similar to Tribe, our soul sisters likely amount to a handful or less in number. Again, if not for lack of proximity, these women would be our Tribe. In fact, they probably were a member of our Tribe until we were separated by circumstance. The strong bonds we share make for a lifetime of friendship. All my love,


Brenda Ridgley is an author, speaker, and connection guru helping people connect intentionally and meaningfully, finding success and joy through relationships. She has an MA Degree in Human Resources Development and her first book Lady and the Tribe will be available on Amazon now and in bookstores soon.

Subscribe to her YouTube channel and Podcast the Connection Connoisseur

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